Just Write

Since caring for my nervous system is my number one priority, I will be adjusting my thought patterns during the day to look out for my own wellness. I can easily wake up thinking about projects like Swell or Groupify. Things I need to do, things I'm not doing well, things I don't want to do be need to, things I wish the team was doing differently... These thoughts come so fast and so quickly and take up a lot of energy. What if I gently guided myself back to me. Take a pause as soon as I wake up, and be with myself. Be with my breath. Be so extremely kind and gentle when my thoughts drift off. As I'm walking around prepping my morning lemon water and l-glutamine drink, I can guide my thoughts to the present moment and the healing I am creating. This right now is LIFE. I am am living, I am not working on anything else. I am just doing the task that is in front of me.

I am my greatest commitment. My present moment connection. Nothing else is more important than my own personal peace and wellbeing, including: Work Projects Friends Family Any other commitments My greatest commitment is to check in with myself and find clarity in the present moment, and to stay aligned to what feels healthy for me. This may mean less money, less status, less external influence, less leadership. None of that matters more than my nervous system being taken care of by honoring what I need, and tuning in to my own center as often as possible.

My father in law has a personality that is very difficult for me to be with. To sit with. To talk to, to listen to. To be around, to be associated with. He makes me very uncomfortable, and feel very clenched up inside. He just so happens to be the HR department for Groupify, a side project I have been working on for free for about 7 months. He asked me to help with their design work, and I was curious and interested enough to say yes. The problem with him, is now that he brought me onto this project, and success I have with the project he sees as his success. He is a... narcissist I think? That word is used so much, I think it's overly used now-a-days, but I actually think he might be one. He sees the world as a sports game, and he is the reigning champion wherever he goes. This can be a great trait to have, it is a very confident approach. But the problem with our interactions is that he does not have an open mind or a soft approach, and comes across to the persons he is speaking

This is a pattern I have found with work. And with my relationship to Cody. I overcommit, I take on a lot of projects because they excite me and I believe I can do them and do them well. Which I can, but there is an underlying anxiety with it. As I am working and solving problems, there is an underlying restlessness that... I am doing too much. How can I bring structure around my endeavors, so I don't feel this restlessness? And so that I can be focused on the logistics of the task at hand, and not sitting inside of emotions? But really present to the current task? Writing my tasks out on paper is helpful. On a big white board to view each day. Way helpful.  Maybe it has to do with me always thinking my mom limited herself, because she wouldn't drive on the freeway or take a cashier job to get out of her comfort zone. I've always explored and have been curious, is there perhaps an overcompensation there?

This phrase is everything right now. I am dropping so many stories, and it's liberating. Sometimes it's very scary if I feel that those stories were what my identity was sitting on. But my real story, is that I am doing great just as is. I don't need to suffer inside of thoughts or negative beliefs. I have the opportunity to alchemize these hard feelings and thoughts and behaviors, transform them into loving kindness to self and the world around me. That's the really beautiful thing about energy and how it works. It can be transformed, even in an instant. It's ok if sometimes, it feels extra sticky to drop those stories. Like, it's a piece of gum we're trying to throw out the window, and it just sticks to our finger no matter how hard we're whipping our hand around. It's ok for us to pull over on the road, and methodically unstick it off of our fingers so to speak... Come into reality as slowly or immediately as you need. You will find peace and clar

I'm allowed to lead because I lead myself. I love my team, because I love myself. I love our work, because I am deeply connected to myself. My present moment is a manifestation of my mission. My mission is to shine light to the world within my balanced and beautiful capacity to do so. To support this mission, I offer self love to myself every possible second of each moment. I buoy my inner child, and she supports me, along with my higher self. We are all aligned, inner child, present moment, higher self, in clarity, compassion, and allowance. I support this mission my releasing the story, and dropping the delusion of negativity. Life is love. And I love what is. Because I choose to, because it is what is. And what is, is FOR me. And if it is FOR me, it is for everyone. So, I am for everyone I come into contact with. I am open. I am allowing. I am deeply connecting and understand how to make choices in the moment, out of loving compassion and clarity. Clarity. Clarity could be my mi